Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
