We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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