carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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