Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
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We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
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So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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