member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
