you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's not a walk of shame if you run