She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
