More tranny stories later!
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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