3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize