U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
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We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
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Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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