I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
