She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize