I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize