Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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