i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
