I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
