I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Redeem this text for a blowjob
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.