So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
