she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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