i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Randomize
