I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
