the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
