I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
ugly people sure do ruin things
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize