Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
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