Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
