quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
