i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
