why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
