Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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