the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
