Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
