i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
