No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
