only if we run a train.
done.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
