The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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