For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
