it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
