I want to stick my p in your. b.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
