If i come over, it means nothing
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize