I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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