very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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