never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize