Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Randomize
