my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
