I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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