Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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