I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
