I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
