What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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