I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
