Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
My dick has a subreddit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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